I'm actually quite looking forward to writing this! Hope my plan makes sense, excited for feedback! (update- realised I may need to cut down due to the wordcount!)
So - I think you need to be careful here in so much as 'Auteur Theory' needs more time and commitment from you in the assignment: it has a context and a history of debate, and it has particular names attached to it (for example, Francois Truffaut), and I think your reader needs more time with the idea (and how it differs from other kinds of film) so they can more fully appreciate your analysis.
In terms of paragraph structure, I'd suggest The Shining synopsis needs to go first, but written in such a way as to establish the characteristics that establish the groundwork for your essay: so you tell us that the film is about a family going to a hotel, but you also tell us that it is an adaptation of an existing work - as it is in the 'adaptation' of an existing story that we might best understand the idea of the auteur - i.e. that a film-maker is still 'doing their thing' even though they have certain responsibilities to the original material.
I'd avoid a paragraph that is 'just about Kubrick' - so a biographical/film-list thing - you've only got 1000 words, so while you need to establish his body of work, don't be tempted to just write a bio; there's no 'content there'.
I did notice that all your references are online... One of my efforts have been to get you using the library catalogue and more reputable sources... are these truly academic, I wonder? They might be useful, but are they 'undergraduate' useful? Really not sure about those 'listverse' style websites... they're not far off clickbait really.
In terms of proving Auteur theory... the one-point perspective/long takes etc. all evidence that because we see these in many of Kubrick's films (which I hope you've at least seen some of?!), but you talk about the colour 'red'... does this help prove Auteurism or does it prove that the The Shining is a film that uses red symbolically? (Lots of films use red symbolically...) I think you need to be really clear about what you're looking at and how well it serves your argument.
I guess what I'm saying is this: I'm not 100% reassured by this structure because a) I don't think it gives enough emphasis to the nuts and bolts of Auteur Theory and b) it looks like you're trying to talk about too much. It seems to me the key to the focus of this assignment is about the relationship between King's The Shining and Kubrick's The Shining; if you're looking for evidence that Kubrick is an auteur (i.e. he uses King's story to his own ends) you're looking at all the ways in which Kubrick inserts himself into the story.
My instinct is you've got a lot of 'factoids' here about The Shining, but the focus/research is a bit superficial. I'd go back to 'Auteur Theory' in the first instance and get a bit more content - I'd also seek some more quality academic sources.
2 Comments
Hey Ren,
ReplyDeleteOkay - I'm just going to link you to Vic's feedback, who is also looking at Auteur Theory...
http://vknjue-animation.blogspot.com/2018/11/essay-ogr.html
So - I think you need to be careful here in so much as 'Auteur Theory' needs more time and commitment from you in the assignment: it has a context and a history of debate, and it has particular names attached to it (for example, Francois Truffaut), and I think your reader needs more time with the idea (and how it differs from other kinds of film) so they can more fully appreciate your analysis.
In terms of paragraph structure, I'd suggest The Shining synopsis needs to go first, but written in such a way as to establish the characteristics that establish the groundwork for your essay: so you tell us that the film is about a family going to a hotel, but you also tell us that it is an adaptation of an existing work - as it is in the 'adaptation' of an existing story that we might best understand the idea of the auteur - i.e. that a film-maker is still 'doing their thing' even though they have certain responsibilities to the original material.
I'd avoid a paragraph that is 'just about Kubrick' - so a biographical/film-list thing - you've only got 1000 words, so while you need to establish his body of work, don't be tempted to just write a bio; there's no 'content there'.
I did notice that all your references are online... One of my efforts have been to get you using the library catalogue and more reputable sources... are these truly academic, I wonder? They might be useful, but are they 'undergraduate' useful? Really not sure about those 'listverse' style websites... they're not far off clickbait really.
In terms of proving Auteur theory... the one-point perspective/long takes etc. all evidence that because we see these in many of Kubrick's films (which I hope you've at least seen some of?!), but you talk about the colour 'red'... does this help prove Auteurism or does it prove that the The Shining is a film that uses red symbolically? (Lots of films use red symbolically...) I think you need to be really clear about what you're looking at and how well it serves your argument.
I guess what I'm saying is this: I'm not 100% reassured by this structure because a) I don't think it gives enough emphasis to the nuts and bolts of Auteur Theory and b) it looks like you're trying to talk about too much. It seems to me the key to the focus of this assignment is about the relationship between King's The Shining and Kubrick's The Shining; if you're looking for evidence that Kubrick is an auteur (i.e. he uses King's story to his own ends) you're looking at all the ways in which Kubrick inserts himself into the story.
My instinct is you've got a lot of 'factoids' here about The Shining, but the focus/research is a bit superficial. I'd go back to 'Auteur Theory' in the first instance and get a bit more content - I'd also seek some more quality academic sources.
Thank you- I'll alter this over the weekend
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